Poop and Pray Q&A: Did Mary Want God To Be Her Baby Daddy?
Welcome to Poop and Pray Q&A, where we tackle the weird, awkward, and honest questions about faith that pop up when you least expect them. If you’ve ever wondered something that feels too “out there” to ask, this is your safe space. Be sure to grab some TP, because we’re diving in! 😉
Someone recently asked me, “Did God rape Mary since she was impregnated without her consent?”
Yikes, right? That’s a tough, uncomfortable question if I’ve ever heard one, but an important one. Wrestling with these questions is how our faith gets stronger.
At first glance, it might seem like something happened to Mary without her choice. And especially in conversations today about consent, that’s a huge red flag. So let’s take a look at what the Bible says, starting right at the beginning of the story.
An Angel Says “Hey!” (Luke 1:28)
The very first thing that happens is an angelic greeting, which is a pretty big deal in the Bible (and now too, I think 😉). As you may suspect, angels pop up for a reason.
When Gabriel appears before Mary, he says:
"Greetings, you who are highly favored! The Lord is with you." (Luke 1:28)
Talk about a mic drop entrance! When God "favors" someone, it usually means their life is about to change massively for His purpose:
Moses — who led the Israelites out of Egypt and got to hang out with God at a burning bush (and potentially made s’mores together) — was told, "You have found favor in my sight, and I know you by name" (Exodus 33:17).
Gideon — who got God to do his laundry (I knew there was more to that fleece trick than met the eye 😉) and led an army to victory — was told by an angel, "The Lord is with you, mighty warrior" (Judges 6:12).
Since these guys were just “regular favored” and they got to do some pretty impressive things, the fact that Mary was “highly favored” is definitely a sign that she's been chosen for something unlike anyone before her.
Angels Freak People Out (Luke 1:29-30)
After this “out of the ordinary” greeting, the very next thing we learn is that Mary,
“... was greatly troubled at the saying, and tried to discern what sort of greeting this might be.” (Luke 1:29)
I am guessing that any of us who just encountered an angel (even a compliment-giving one) would be a bit concerned if we were in Mary’s sandals.
Angels pretty much scare the 💩 out of everyone who sees them throughout the Bible. Remember how Gideon thought he was going to die (Judges 6:22–23) or how Daniel literally collapsed on his face? (Daniel 10:9–12)?
So it makes sense why Gabriel immediately reassures her:
“Do not be afraid, Mary, for you have found favor with God.” (Luke 1:30)
The Invitation and Her Thumbs Up (Luke 1:31-38)
Once she's convinced the angel isn’t there to zap her, Gabriel shares God’s plan for what will happen next:
“You will conceive and give birth to a son, and you are to call him Jesus.” (Luke 1:31)
This isn't something that's already happened or a command necessarily telling her what to do, since the original Greek verb tenses for "You will conceive and give birth" are in the future indicative tense, which is used to state a simple future fact or a prediction.
Rather than showing unwillingness to move forward, Mary asks a clarifying (and very practical 😉) question:
“How will this be, since I am a virgin?” (Luke 1:34)
Gabriel then answers the question we are all wondering, which in many ways raises more questions than it answers 😉:
“The Holy Spirit will come upon you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you.” (Luke 1:35)
I don’t know if it’s just me, but I still can’t decide if this is more or less mysterious than how God created Adam from dust and Eve from Adam’s rib… 🤔
After the announcement, the question, and the explanation, Mary gives her full consent:
“I am the servant of the Lord. Let it be to me according to your word.” (Luke 1:38)
The Greek word for "servant" is doulē, which can also be translated as handmaiden. In that time, a handmaiden was a trusted and respected member of a household, not a forced laborer. By using this term, Mary is expressing a willing heart and her deep trust in God.
We All Have a Choice
Even though Mary said "yes," we're still talking about the Creator of the universe asking a young female to carry His baby, which might be seen as about as unequal a power dynamic as there can be.
However, we do see examples of others in the Bible who say “no” to God:
Moses originally objected to leading the Israelites, but with God’s help, Moses willingly moved forward.
The rich young ruler asked Jesus what he needed to do for eternal life. When Jesus told him to sell everything and follow Him, the guy basically said "nah" and walked away. Jesus let him go.
We don’t know what would have happened if Mary said no, but what we do know is that she asks questions, gets answers, and then says yes.
After making her decision, she doesn't hide in shame or despair. She goes to visit her relative, Elizabeth, and bursts into a joyful song of praise and gratitude to God (Luke 1:46-55).
This is not the typical response of someone who has simply resigned themselves to their fate.
In Mary’s case, she said yes, not out of fear or coercion, but out of trust and joy. She was not a victim but a willing participant who played a key role in God’s plan.
God doesn’t force people to follow Him; He invites. He explains. And then He waits for our answer. We have the same choice today.
So, next time God interrupts your plans, don't flush your questions. Ask them. Wrestle with them. Like Mary, you might just find joy on the other side of your "yes."
And hey, if this whole conversation has you thinking about other faith questions that have you “backed up”, click this link to grab a free printable I made for you called "Stop, Drop, and Ask" that will help you keep track of your questions, along with a list of resources to help you research, reflect, and pray through them.
Speaking of questions -- what's YOUR awkward faith question that you've been too embarrassed to ask out loud? Drop it in the comments or shoot me an email, and it might just become the next Poop and Pray Q&A!
